WHY RELATIONSHIP?
Man was never created to live in isolation; every person needs a companion, a friend, a confidant. We all need relationships. When God created Adam, He saw that Adam was good. Everything about Adam was perfect. So why did He have to create Eve.
GOD said, "It's not good for the Man to be alone; I'll make him a helper, a companion.” (Gen 2:18)
Adam was having a good time with God, yet God knew Adam needed a companion. Someone like Adam, someone who will help him fulfill his God given purpose, HIS God-given goals, someone who will be there when he needed encouragement, someone who he could laugh with and share with, someone like him, but unique in their own way.
Isolation is not healthy; God did not create us for Isolation but for relationship.
That is why today we have families, friends, associates, and others we relate to.
Iron sharpeneth iron; So a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend. (Pro 27:17)
…and let us consider one another to provoke unto love and good works; not forsaking our own assembling together, as the custom of some is, but exhorting one another; and so much the more, as ye see the day drawing nigh. (Heb 10:24-25)
There is an innate nature in man to relate that God has put in us. That is why no matter how much a person has being disappointed, hurt, betrayed, abused or ignored, they still look for companionship or someone they can relate to.
WHAT IS RELATIONSHIP?
Different people will give different meanings to the word “relationship” depending on how they perceive it.However, I personally believe that relationship is the art of communicating, dwelling, relating and responding to others positively or negatively. Good relationships are largely responsible for peace in the home, in a nation, and even in the international circuit. Billy Graham says and I quote,“If we’d just learn to love each other we wouldn’t have so many problems …… Because you can’t love someone and hate them at the same time”
Relationship is a thing of the heart,
A good man out of the good treasure of the heart brings forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things. (Mat 12:35)
When the scribes approached Jesus concerning divorce, He spoke to them about their heart.
...and they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. But Jesus said unto them, For your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. (Mar 10:4-5)
What ever way we feel in our hearts towards our spouse, children, parents, friends, colleagues, fellow church members etc will definitely determine our relationships with them. So we have to go back to the issue of the heart. Jesus never got involved in relational issues rather he always referred people back to their hearts when it came to relational matters. He always asked people to check their heart.
Keep thy heart with all diligence; For out of it are the issues of life. (Pro 4:23)
What is the state of your heart? The state of your heart will determine your relationships. It will determine whether your relationships are positive or negative. The Bible gives us numerous examples where the state of the heart has affected relationships.
We see Cain and Abel. The state of Cain’s heart caused him to kill his brother Abel. His heart was full of Jealousy.
…but unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell. And Jehovah said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen? (Gen 4:5-6)
God pointed Cain to his heart. Many a times our countenance will reflect our heart. And Cain told Abel his brother.
And it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him. (Gen 4:8)
We also see the case of Joseph and his brothers. The same attitude that was displayed by Cain is once again reflected by Joseph’s brothers - Jealousy.
Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colors. And his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren; and they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him. And Joseph dreamed a dream, and he told it to his brethren: and they hated him yet the more. (Gen 37:3-5)
When we look at this story we are faced with three big enemies to relationship:
1. Insensitivity
2. Lack of tact
3. Jealousy
Jacob was insensitive to the feelings of his others sons. There is a lack of tact on the part of Joseph. These gave birth to jealousy which invariable destroyed a potentially beautiful relationship amongst brothers. When we go into the New Testament we see the relationship between Judas and Jesus.
And while he yet spake, lo, Judas, one of the twelve, came, and with him a great multitude with swords and staves, from the chief priest and elders of the people. Now he that betrayed him gave them a sign, saying, “Whomsoever I shall kiss, that is he: take him.” And straightway he came to Jesus, and said, Hail, Rabbi; and kissed him. And Jesus said unto him, Friend, do that for which thou art come. Then they came and laid hands on Jesus, and took him. (Mat 26:47-50)
We see here a relationship which on Judas’ part was based on greed. On the other hand in the same Bible we see a relationship based on trust, loyalty, commitment, covenant, love and not greed.
RUTH AND NAOMI
And they lifted up their voice, and wept again: and Orpah kissed her mother-in-law, but Ruth clave unto her. And she said, Behold, thy sister-in-law is gone back unto her people, and unto her god: return thou after thy sister-in-law. And Ruth said, Entreat me not to leave thee, and to return from following after thee, for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge; thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God; where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: Jehovah do so to me, and more also, if aught but death part thee and me. (Ruth 1:14-17)
The story of Ruth and Naomi is a wonderful example of a positive relationship. Ruth was married into Naomi’s family when tragedy struck. Ruth did not run of but became a source of encouragement to Naomi; I believe Ruth’s action propelled Naomi to another level of faith in God. The greatest need for Naomi at this time of need was for companionship, a friend and a sister.
We all need someone like that in our lives, someone who will be there for us in our hour of need. Someone who will encourage us when we are discouraged. Someone to cover us when we are naked, cold and in need of comfort. Someone who will speak the truth when we need to hear the truth.
Ruth didn’t have to go with Naomi. Ruth understood covenantal relationship.
David and Jonathan’s relationship was built on trust.
And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. (1Sa 18:1)
Relationship should be based on love and trust:
Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was upon him, and gave it to David, and his apparel, even to his sword, and to his bow, and to his girdle. (1Sa 18:3-4)
At the death of Jonathan David went out looking for Jonathan’s son.
Relationship occupies a special place in the heart of God
Love never fails: but whether there be prophecies, they shall be done away; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall be done away. (1Co 13:8)
